Cup Chaos: Portugal wakes up while England ties. Chad hates corporate hydration breaks. Tech Fails: Snapchat’s $2K glasses are a $3B boat anchor. Anthropic hypes AI like a superweapon. The New Malls: Data centers are being overbuilt just like 80s malls. Ghost Hunting: NY bans fake ghost jobs. Wild Perks: Emi got a blow-up doll; Chad hit a strip club with his religious boss.